Hello from the other side

Today marks the four year anniversary of Madeline Rose passing away. This is my favorite "Madie Hello" from this year.

Some history:

In August of 2015 I was deeply struggling after dropping MarShae off at BYU.  I knew a period of my life had come to an end and I didn't want to go home and face the life in front of me. So many aspects were difficult. 

Madie and MarShae were raised together like twins. They had a twin telepathy that I was able to witness first hand repeatedly. I knew I wouldn't have the daily reminders the quirks that were unique to the two girls. MarShae was also living in the same dorm as Madie had lived in at BYU.  

I clearly remember being home alone that first week because Marielle had stayed in Utah with friends.  August 20th I cried on and off all day. It marked 45 months since Madie had died.  I was deeply depressed and I didn't know what I would do with my life. Marielle had recently pointed out that she was an artist and that artists work alone, so I also knew that another aspect of my life was shifting.  Eighteen years of involvement with Klein High Theater and supporting my children who were involved there was changing, possibly ending.

 I was at a crossroads, and I didn't know where to go.  

I woke up August 21, 2015 and the tears started flowing again. Today because it was MarShae's 19th birthday and I was sitting home alone in my bed immobilized with grief. 

A few hours into that morning I had a pep talk with myself and basically said, 
"You can sit here in this bed again and cry all day, increasing the sinus headache you already have, or you can get up, get dressed, go to the temple and cry there.  At least there you will be doing something for someone else, and you will be around people." 
I got myself dressed,took a leap of faith and went.  I experienced a beautiful spirit that warmed my heart, tears freely flowed but I felt comfort from above that everything would be okay, eventually. I determined this was something I  should do to help me get through this adjustment in my life. 
I started going a couple of times a week. I felt renewed every time I went. I experienced things that were sacred, healing began and I often felt in the hands of my Savior. 

In October with a habit in place I found myself at the first trigger of reminders of the anniversary around the corner, Marielle's birthday October 19th. The temple was closed because it was a Monday so I went the following day with a friend and had a beautiful experience.  This prompted me to return three more days that week, going with Larry Saturday evening October 24, 2015. That night while praying in the Celestial Room about the upcoming anniversary that I felt looming around the corner, the idea clearly came "If you go to the temple as often as possible between now and the anniversary, it will be easier this year for you."  With the struggles I knew were in front of me I committed to my Heavenly Father to go every day that I could until the anniversary November 20,2016. This set in motion a year of miracles that I had no way of knowing were in front of me. I  had experiences every day through the anniversary that I couldn't explain.  It became like a treasure hunt, never knowing what unexpected thing might happen, but also realizing these were given to me as gifts. A witness of love from my Savior. 

Early in November I determined and committed to going everyday the Temple was open till the end of the year, because since the accident I struggled with the entire holiday season and wanted continued strength and help. 

Tender mercies continued to happen everyday, and I wish I had recorded every one of them. I did share most of them with Larry and Marielle each night, but many are forgotten. 

On New Year's Day  as I looked at the year in front of me I committed to attend everyday in 2016 that the Temple was open unless I had a family conflict. I wanted as much help as heaven would give. I realized MarShae going on a mission would be another goodbye for a year and a half with only weekly emails to communicate.
  
On this fourth anniversary I will share my favorite experience. Everything I have shared so far helps set the stage of this personal miracle.

 It is now February 25, 2016. At this point I don't have unexplainable experiences daily, so when they happen they are a pleasant surprise. It has become second nature to me, to attend daily and do ordinances for my ancestors who died without them. 
(For those who haven't been in our temples or learned about them I will briefly explain because it's a part of the miracle)
These ordinances include Baptism, Confirmation, Initiatory (symbolic washing and annointings), then an Endowment which is a process of covenants made between us and Heavenly Father.  Last is Sealing of families. 

Today I am doing an Endowment and seated in front of me are three women also doing Endowments for their ancestors.  The miracle begins to unfold as I notice this card on the floor by my feet. 

I pick it up, realizing it must belong to one of the girls in front of me.  These "cards" represent an ancestor and are used to mark and date when each ordinance is completed in the Temple. I immediately notice the name of the person who submitted the card Katie "Rose" Hart. Madie's middle name Rose gets my attention.

Madie singing
 "Set Fire to the Rain  May 2011

   I also notice the first name of the ancestor is Adele who was Madie's favorite singer, and her last name is Grave.   I think "that is kind of cool", and  I tap the girl in front of me and ask her if this happens to be her card.  She responds "yes" and I return her card to her.
   

Later we stand up and somehow her card floats through the air and lands in front of me again.  We make eye contact and grin and because we have things to do I motion that I will place the card on the empty seat next to me, and she agrees.  When we sit down again I decide maybe I need to inspect this card more closely.  I look at the dates and bells start going off in my head.  I have a quirky thing for dates, and often feel it is a way Madie communicates with me.

This card is loaded.  Baptism and Confirmation, August 21, 2015.  MarShae's last birthday.  Initiatory, Oct 24, 2015 when I committed to go everyday to the temple leading up to the 3rd anniversary.  Then I noticed in small print at the bottom left this card was reprinted on Nov 20, 2015, the 3rd anniversary.

At this point I can't even believe what I am looking at.  

I become aware of how many things took place for this to occur.  My mind is reeling. Happy tears fill my eyes!  I know Madie is so thrilled I finally got it! 

I feel her excitement! 

Then I look at the ancestor who is having her work done, and remember that Adele, released her song "Hello" November 20, 2015 on the third anniversary of Madie's death.  I soon hand this card back to Katie and whisper, "Can I talk to you in the Celestial Room?" She agrees as tears of joy spill onto my lap.  I know this was an incredible gift given in a way that would speak to me personally.  

In the Celestial Room I explain everything to Katie and she shares her side of the story. She is the only member in her family.  In August after her mission,while visiting her grandparents she asked her grandfather if he would drive her to the temple in Kansas City. He doesn't understand the need for temples but agrees to take her and she does the baptisms there, on MarShae's birthday.  Katie later does the initiatory in the Jordan River Temple (which was the last Temple I went to with MarShae and Marielle when we dropped MarShae off at BYU). 
Katie later returns to live in Houston after fall semester. Because she is the only member of her family she tries to come to the temple every Tuesday to do an ordinance for an ancestor of hers.  Tuesday didn't work that week, and that morning she canceled plans with a friend because she felt she was supposed to come and we just happened to be in the same session when her card miraculously ends up in front of me twice. 
She also explained that over the past few weeks she had looked at Adele's card and considered doing it, but felt she should do one of Adele's sisters so hadn't.  That morning as she was driving to the temple "Hello" came on the radio and the thought came to her, "you should do Adele today".  We looked into each other's eyes, realizing we were part of a miracle to witness to both of us, how real this work is, and how involved the other side is in our lives.  It's wonderful to  know what I believed before, and will always witness of miracles that are available to us. As we open our eyes, pray in faith, Help is always there; eventually.

To Madeline and Heavenly Father,
Thank you for knowing me well enough to give me experiences that would be so personal to me.  
Madie, I miss you with all my heart, I've learned so much from your life and death. I love you dearly, and can't wait for that glorious day when we will be reunited.
Until then, keep sending me Hello's from the other side"



"Hello" by Adele
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfG6VKnjrVw